Lies

• Stephen Colbert was not funny.
• Helen Thomas is old and batty.
• Mexicans are taking our jobs.
• Iraq sent its WMDs to Syria.
• Democrats don't want to wiretap terrorists.
• Joe Wilson admitted that Valerie Plame wasn't covert.
• Karl Rove has a faulty memory.
• Scooter Libby has a faulty memory.
• Tom DeLay is like Jesus Christ.
• No one could have anticipated that the levees would be breached.
• We do not torture.
• There is no global warming.
• There is global warming, but humans didn't cause it.
• Howard Dean can't raise money.
• John F. Kerry is a flip-flopper.
• George W. Bush is a decider.
• John McCain is a straight-shooter.
• Dick Cheney is a sober shooter.
• Nobody at the White House knows Jack Abramoff.
• Democrats do.
• The economy is great.
• Evolution isn't supported by the facts.
• Diebold voting machines are secure.
• Fox News is fair and balanced.
• Mission accomplished.
• Bill Clinton did it too.
• No one could have anticipated the Iraqi insurgency.
• The budget deficit will be cut in half in four years.
• Anyone who thinks Dubai shouldn't control our ports is racist.
• No one who thinks we should build a wall along the Mexican border is racist.
• George Allen isn't a racist... anymore.
• Terry Schiavo wants to live.
• Andrea Clark wants to die.
• We've turned a corner in Iraq.
• There's a war on Christmas.
• There's a war on Easter.
• There's no civil war in Iraq.
• The British government has learned that Saddam Hussein recently sought significant quantities of uranium from Africa.
• Up is down.
• Black is white.

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